performance anxiety

performance anxiety calm

i haven’t been writing much lately: here or on paper.

and as i sat here thinking about WHY, i wondered, for the tiniest moment, if it was because i was anxious…

if it was because i had fallen back into the TRAP of comparing myself with others and coming up short.
or if it was that what i wanted to say wouldn’t come out right and that it would be misinterpreted.

and i realised as i sat here, in quiet conversation with myself that i wasn’t comparing. and i’m not anxious.

i’m totally calm. and still.

and the words aren’t coming because nothing is clamouring to be said.

(well, apart from this obviously)

11 thoughts on “performance anxiety

  • I quite love this. Love imagining you siting in quiet having a little stare down with the page. I know those moments well.

  • I’ve had that – had to get a book to help me with it and now steer clear of things I know I can’t handle!
    Send me your details – I just joined facebook!!

  • I think you may have found inner zen my dear…..I love the idea that you don’t write because nothing is clamouring to be said. It sounds to me as if unintentionally you have got it sussed…

  • Funny that. You can see why the ancient Greeks believed in muses. Because sometimes, the words don’t let me sleep, clamouring to be born. And sometimes…
    There just aren’t any. Fortunately I don’t make my living writing so I don’t have to slog through the quiet days trying to make the words come.


  • I am very, very glad that you are calm instead of anxious. I too struggle with comparing myself to others… hopefully someday I will learn peace.

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