i used to think that if i had all the right gear – enamelware, hunter wellies (well, i never actually had those), the right brand of handbag and overcoat, shelves overflowing with all the right kids of books, fantastic travel stories (ok, i do have a few of those), an instagram account that everyone wanted to follow, a blog with loads of commenters, a life well-lived in a vibrant city, that i would have it made. thing is, in nz, nobody i want to hang out with gives a shit what labels i wear and they’ve never even heard of the company that makes my handbag. so what was it all for? yeah. nothing. so i threw out all the toast catalogues and sold my kinfolk magazines. because i don’t need them and because they don’t make me feel good. this realisation comes with liberation – more clearing out of stuff i thought was necessary to enhance my life that really just took up physical and emotional space. the less stuff i have, the easier it is for me to appreciate exactly what i do have – a really amazing life. and when i spend less time trying to be like you and more time simply being myself, that is where my truest, and kindest, moving loving and peaceful life is.
so much of life on the internet is displayed through filters (others, as well as my own), i wonder how much of another being i can truly get to know this way. enough, I suppose, to be able to tell me if I want to get to know someone a little more so I can then reach out and say hello.
i never understood running until being introduced to the trails here. now i can’t imagine my life without early sunday morning runs that can last up to four hours and include beaches, stairs, rope climbs and hilltops with stunning views.
brisbane: the hum of thousands of air conditioning units, street sweepers and boy racers at 2am. no thanks. I am definitely not a city girl. i like the island life we have chosen for ourselves.
the conversation with my sister that starts: “just after it flooded here we found a snake curled up in the BBQ” and I think to myself “a whole lotta nope” with regards to living in Australia.
Ways to charm me: edible flower bunches for sale
4 thoughts on “october”
Love this post, Leonie!
Although my circumstances are different & I am a big city boy, your thoughts resonate deeply with me. After finishing my book, I found myself deeply unsatisfied with how much of life was focussed on online activities and online reputation. During my recent three weeks in New York, I posted updates, but wasn’t online much. It was great to be exploring the city without reference to my iPhone, asking strangers for directions, navigating with paper maps I would draw in my hotel room every night.
So it’s true then, that Australia really does have a lot of ‘critters’ of the variety that scare the crap out of me…
I had to give up on a lot of what I subscribed to in how I thought about my online ‘popularity’ two years ago and it took me a long while to be able to recognize the unsavory bits that brought me to the place of needing that reinforcement so badly. And while I haven’t figured a lot out, I do recognize when I start to go into those territories again, so I guess that’s something.
The other morning I was commenting that I would never have figured to be the girl talking about her workouts that are a part of my life so much now, I almost don’t remember the lady that had all the excuses to not.
Not sure which is worse chasing something unobtainable or getting it.
Enjoying the daily posts!
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