3 In thinking out loud

status anxiety

20140401-081637.jpg
self-portrait, yesterday

swirling thoughts, little remnants from slumber, waking early, with a head full of to-do’s and what-if’s – all of these things feeding into my current status anxiety.

sas wrote beautifully about sacred responsibility recently; about all the tiny choices she made that have got her to where she is now. her eloquence, vulnerability and willingness to be honest with herself are little lights that comfort me and whisper “keep going”.

though i know this is right where i need to be and that my own little tiny choices have led me to here, there’s still a bit of niggling anxiety:

i have been known to give up on things when they get “too hard”, to run away and hide rather than making friends with my fears. even if there will be times i want to give up, it feels like it really is time to embrace my own conscious choice; to stay open, and saying yes, to what is next.

and, with friends like Sas and Lisa lighting the way, it makes me braver and more willing to.

i am winded, unsure,
and willing.
lisa field-elliot

  • Jude woods
    02/04/2014 at 22:54

    Hhhhhhhmm, (sigh!) someone else is thinking what I’m thinking…perhaps we are all the same I this respect? At least those who strive to be more …you always find the best way to say things even if you don’t say the out loud. These are our private conversations with ourselves, so hard to come to terms with and face with confidence. We press on fearfully but courageously believing we will become. And we will. Faith (your middle name) is substantiating things hoped for and bringing into evidence things not yet seen.. It is our calling to step out and become, to evidence what we envision, to hope that we can become beneficial to someone else and significant in our time. The only thing we can do is take each step, one after the other and believe… (By the way you do make a huge difference wherever you are. You communicate with courage and insight, stay on the path I’m right behind you :-))

  • Andrew Baird
    01/04/2014 at 09:57

    Only one way to find out – embrace and discover the answer!

    Being inspired by those who have walked the path before me (sacred whispers) helps me to keep going when the going gets tough (that and the quiet whispers inside!)

    • leoniewise
      01/04/2014 at 09:59

      so very true to embrace and discover the answer – life is one giant experiment after all.

      sacred whispers – i like that.