uncomfortable places

sit with me. bend of ivy lodge, north carolina, usa

even as i learn to love myself wholly and unconditionally, there are uncomfortable places inside me that, on some days, i just don’t like very much.

recently a treasured friend of mine gave me a very precious gift. she offered me some words she thought might help. they were about releasing the wanting to be someone other than who i am.

so today, even if just for a moment, i choose to sit with myself & embrace those uncomfortable places…

i sit, with love, giving myself permission to accept in this moment, the part/s of me:

where i know what i need to do and how and i still don’t do it
where the lesson seems too hard
where i don’t ever feel like i’m going to find my way
where i fall back into hiding after showing myself my light
where i want to feel brave, yet feel tiny and overwhelmed
where i want to commit, yet something holds me back
where joy would reside, if i released the anger
where i feel i don’t belong anywhere
where i feel insignificant
where i want so desperately to be part of the group and i feel like i’m not invited
where i’m too afraid to ask, for fear the answer will be no
where i feel like i need to be part of the group at all
that want to try something new, and hesitate, for fear of failure
that rushes around, fearful of sitting, taking the time, to just BE with myself (what on earth am i afraid i might find?)
where i believe my story doesn’t matter
where i feel like i’ve nothing valuable to contribute so keep quiet

today, just for this moment, i embrace all of these uncomfortable places…
without DOing anything, or trying to CHANGE, JUDGE or FIX anything…
just embracing them for what they are.

i sit, feeling all of them and claim them as a part of me. i recognise that, even with these uncomfortable bits – in fact, because of these uncomfortable bits – i am the best possible example of myself that i can be right now.

how about your uncomfortable places?
do they need some love, some non-judgement & acceptance as being part of the beautiful uniqueness of YOU?